Michael Ironside leads an Armored Stagecoach Through Post-apocalyptic Utah.

DIRECTED BY MONTE MARKHAM/1991

BLU-RAY STREET DATE: NOVEMBER 14, 2023/KL STUDIO CLASSICS

In the year 1991, something that can be best described as a tonally warbled and frigid post-apocalyptic road-trip tale was released upon the Earth.  And by “the Earth”, I mean mom n’ pop video store shelves.  The thing in question?  Actor-briefly-turned-director Monte Markham’s Michael Ironside starrer, Neon City.

“It’s the journey, not the destination” is an all-too-common adage when it comes to considering the value in any given trip.  Yet in this case, the destination is the title of this feature length group venture across what appears to be a snow-dusted northwest region of the American wastelands circa 2053.  Throughout the impressive bonus features on this KL Studio Classics release, people keep referring to the movie as “A poor man’s Road Warrior”, and the like.  Weirdly, there’s nary a mention of the film that obviously the far greater influence on this nonsense, John Ford’s Stagecoach (1939).

Case in point: in Neon City, a ragtag group of disparate passengers (personified by an equally unlikely cast, including Vanity [of Prince and the Revolution], Juliet Landau [TV’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer], Valerie Wildman [TV’s Days of Our Lives], Richard Sanders [TV’s WKRP in Cincinnati] and former football player Lyle Alzado) board an armored transport to transverse hostile terrain and attack-happy mutant raiders.  Stops at outposts along the way allow for varied bonding and conflicts of the diverse characters.  Their shared destination: the supposed utopian stronghold of Neon City itself.  (Which turns out to be an indoor civilization not unlike Oz, but with more neon and oversized-banquet-hall vibe).

Ironside, looking like a ponytailed cross between Jack Nicholson and Bob Hope, is determined to deliver his extremely wanted “red star” prisoner (Vanity) to authorities in Neon City.  Per their initial relationship, the characters hate other (after a particularly abrasive exchange, she hits him with this parting shot, “You know, for an asshole, you’re a reeeal asshole!”), but along the way, they bond… in more ways than one.

In a newly conducted video interview, Ironside vividly recalls the experience of filming Neon City in the aggressively frigid Salt Lake City winter as a brutal shit-kicking fight of a shoot.”  It’s great to see Ironside reflecting about the opportunities this film gave him.  Rarely had he been cast as a heroic lead, even a dark, antihero lead like this character.  He talks about how his awkward love scene with Vanity was a first for him, and how she advised him.  (Perhaps this is the only aspect of acting in this film where the late Vanity arrived with experience surpassing the storied Ironside).

Actor-turned-director Monte Markham verifies the film’s horrendous shooting conditions throughout his new audio commentary track.  Markham gets off to a good start, although about ten minutes in, disc producer Heather Buckley (of Black Mansion Films) chimes with some helpful prompts and continues to do so throughout.  This turns out to be an ideal exchange.

Armed with a brand-new HD master from a 2K scan of the interpositive (a key intermediary element used to strike release prints- although, was Neon City ever in theaters?), the feature presentation on this new Blu-ray edition is awfully good.  In a first for me in my years of reviewing home video releases, the bonus features menu includes a vintage “VHS Trailer & Sales Reel”- something intended to entice video store owners and product buyers into going all in on Neon City.  It’s a find to be sure, and is a solid few minutes of some pretty bygone-era impressive hype.  Not dissimilarly, KL goes the extra mile to lure today’s buyers with not only the high-quality transfer and extras, but a cardboard slipcover over the standard plastic packaging.  People love that crap.

More watchable than a novice might expect but absolutely overrated in its own disc extras, Neon City turns out to be a long, strange trip that doesn’t suck.  It’s great to see Juliet Landau sharpening her teeth on a very different role than the evil vampire she’s known for, but it’s sad to see Richard Sanders, so perfect as Leslie Nessman on WKRP, playing a pathetic sad clown.  The film’s focus on action doesn’t quite work out, as exemplified in one of the big action moments being a shot of the transport vehicle driving through a three-foot high wall of burning tires.  BAH-Dhoooomm!!  It’s an apropos bump in the very bumpy road to the final destination of Neon City… and Neon City’s latest destination on home video.