Ursula Andress aims for Riches in Fernando Di Leo Comedy/Action Hybrid
DIRECTED BY FERNANDO DI LEO/ITALIAN/1975
BLU-RAY STREET DATE: JANUARY 30, 2024/RARO VIDEO (via Kino Lorber)
The chance to make a quick $100 by delivering a letter to a stranger initially turns stewardess Nora Green’s (Ursula Andress) layover in Naples into a spiral of getting slapped around by criminal thugs. But when the opportunity to intercept $10,000 presents itself, she has no trouble with presenting herself to whomever might help her towards it. Never mind the raging local gang war that she must navigate, this former Bond girl (the original, in fact) is ready and willing to seduce the money into her hands.
Considering its own crime film target, it’s interesting that Loaded Guns (Colpo in canna) has shockingly few guns, loaded or otherwise. The movie operates like Neapolitan ice cream, in three distinct chunks: 1. Andress cultivating the Big Con, 2. The all-hands-on-deck (except for her, mostly) amusement park fistfight, and 3. A prolonged kooky car chase to wrap things up. Outsmarting rival gangs by escalating their tensions into violence worked really well for Clint Eastwood in A Fistful of Dollars, so why not for Andress in Naples? In any case, whatever’s really in the sterling MacGuffin the case, this is quite the layover for this resourceful and enduring stewardess.
Perhaps Di Leo’s decision to score a very physically comedic gang-on-gang showdown (the second of the three above segments) in an empty but operational amusement park with silent movie piano music is a nod to Chaplin’s The Circus or something. Perhaps. If so, then sorry… no Kewpie doll. The music only persists as grating and can’t end soon enough. Extra points, though, for the rough n’ tumble cheese of it all. But even good cheese can wear out its welcome. This fight sequence- this interminable cinematic coagulation of casein- goes on for what feels like a half hour. Hilarity nor regularity can ensue.
In the twenty-minute bonus featurette “Fernando Di Leo: Parody of a Genre,” we’re told that Loaded Guns was the result of Di Leo looking to make lighter films, but not yet ready to altogether abandon the hard-boiled nihilistic corner of the crime genre which made him. (See: Caliber 9; The Italian Connection). Consequently, Loaded Guns is the first of just such a trilogy. It is followed by fellow “comedies” Nick the Sting (1976) and Mr. Scarface (aka Rulers of the City; also 1976). Whether any of these three films are truly crime parodies is up for debate, were anyone inclined to debate such a thing.
In any case, the Parody of a Genre featurette is a vintage bonus feature with Di Leo collaborators reflecting on this phase of his career. One participant who will not be named goes on about how Andress was “in her washed-up period” by the time Loaded Guns rolled around, and snickers about having to put layers of gauze over the lens to soften her looks. From there his recollections get even more misogynistic. Gross, but on the other hand, this is definitely not another extra feature that’s been sanitized by lawyers within an inch of its life. But some people need to learn to keep their mouths shut, especially on camera.
Newer is an audio commentary by film historian Rachael Nisbet, who’s delivery of her densely well-informed research is obviously being read from a script. Nisbet’s delivery, though, is far from lifeless droning. She knows her Di Leo facts and timeline, and is happy to unpack how Loaded Guns fits and doesn’t fit with what came prior. Nisbet acknowledges the aforementioned harsh criticism of Andress’ appearance, rightfully coming to the then-thirty-eight-year-old still-beautiful actress’s defense while summarizing her career highs and lows. (Where might having John Ford movie legend Woody Strode call her character, “You goddamn beautiful bitch!!” rank? Because that totally happens in Loaded Guns).
The Raro Video Blu-ray edition of Loaded Guns (enabled by Kino Lorber) has a consistently terrific time-and-place-appropriate image: very 1975, but also not worn in the slightest. It offers the option of the default Italian audio track (with English subtitles) or an English language track. Since these Italian films of this time were postsynched anyway, there is no wrong choice to be made here. I prefer the English track since that’s the language that the lead speaks on camera. On the downside, I found that the English subs remained on, causing me to have to pause everything so I could manually get rid of them. Still, this is a can’t-miss disc for Fernando Di Leo and/or Ursula Andress fans.
While Andress’ lows are not abysmal, Loaded Guns slots in as a step down from her Hollywood heyday in the previous decade- though far from an out and out embarrassment. (And a reminder, she goes on to play Aphrodite herself in 1981’s Clash of the Titans. Apropos casting, that). The ever-statuesque Andress carries the film- and herself- quite well through Di Leo’s manically rough and absurd delivery vehicle of goofy fisticuffs, occasional full-on nudity and painfully strained laughs.
Ursula Andress’ committed performance here exemplifies the difference between a “strong female character” and a “strong female presence.” The character is what it is. But Andress’ presence goes the distance for the flailing Di Leo. An international star and sex symbol, she has long been saddled with the lazy nickname “Ursula Undress”, which is just crass and belittling, really. …Though she does undress a lot in this.
While Loaded Guns on the whole may not be all that much of a movie, it has about as much of Andress as possible. This semi-violent corny comedy is as good a vehicle for her as the small car she drives down steps multiple times during the big final chase. Which is, as it says onscreen when the thing finally ends, Fine.